14 students were present at the most recent meeting, most of whom knew of someone their age who had been, or was currently being physically or emotionally abused.
Abuse in the form of bullying was not as prominent as it was in elementary school, they said, but violence between those in relationships was something they see and hear a lot about.
EPHS student and coalition member Heather Manaku said she stood up for a girl she didn’t know who she saw was being treated poorly by a male student.
“I walked by, and she was giving him a candy and he smacked it out of her hand and was calling her all these names. I didn’t know them but I told him, ‘What’s your problem?’ I looked like a jerk for doing it and he got pissed and told me off,” said Manaku. “She was crying, and I talked to her and we’re friends now. If you see it don’t worry about looking like jerk. You’re helping somebody.”
It’s also important for people to be conscious of double standards in domestic violence, said EPHS Senior Sergio Jimenez.
“I remember I saw this girl smacking a guy around in public, and I stood there making sure that the guy wouldn’t hit her back,” said Jimenez. “When I went home, I realized the girl was hitting him pretty badly, and the guy wasn’t hitting her back, but I didn’t do anything about it. I waited for the guy to do something for me to intervene, but I should’ve intervened anyway.”
The students agreed that domestic violence was not a thing of the past, but that the cycle of abuse continues when younger generations witnessing their elders in abusive situations.
“They learn it from somewhere,” said EPHS Senior Eric Castillo.
Manaku said one of her closest friends, whose family had a history of domestic violence, had been in an abusive relationship.
“It was really hard seeing her go through that because I grew up with her, and for some reason she always wanted to stay with him,” said Manaku. “He didn’t just abuse her physically, it was also emotionally. Her family is surrounded by that, so that kind of had an impact and she thought it was okay.”
Coalition member Juan Correa said he has a friend whose father abuses her and her mother.
“They never say anything about it, and I’ve been trying to convince her to talk about it but she never does,” said Correa.
When asked if they thought a youth group for domestic violence awareness would be successful, the students said it would be a good idea, but that some might feel scared or embarrassed to share their stories. Group member Jasmin De Luna said victims should not feel self-conscious about their experiences.
“Don’t be ashamed,” said De Luna. “It’s real life”