“Domestic violence and abuse is huge here in Eagle Pass. In 2013 we had two murders, and one murder last year due to domestic violence,” said Vela. “We want to inform our community that we don’t want to see violence, we don’t want to see anybody dead. We want the county on our side, we want the commissioners to support our ideas and our visions, and we want them to back us up if we end up going to the senator for help.”
The county’s backing of MCCADV would also mean easier access to legal documents to protect help domestic violence survivors.
“The need to assist the families affected by domestic violence is the need for us to be able to process some of their requests for court orders and restraining orders and that really handled at the county, by the county clerk,” said MCCADV Co-Chairperson Terri Patlan-Contreras. “We are going to address our concerns at the county to please allocate somewhere in the budget to hire a full time person and funds for training. Legal aide had come and said that they would be willing to help train.”
The county might also have land they could use for the shelter, suggested Patlan-Contreras.
Vela said she contacted all the Maverick County Commissioners ,but only heard back from two: Commissioner Jerry Morales, who sent Carmen Ponce as a representative for Precinct 1, and Commissioner Pete Venegas who could not make it, but told Vela to inform him on what happened at the meeting.
MCCADV Co-Chair Simon Sotelo said it was vital that they stress the importance of addressing domestic violence in the community, especially to the government.
“3.8 million dollars of state money is sitting somewhere and the state has yet to respond to us where it’s at. All they tell us is there’s no money available,” said Sotelo. “We have consistently tried to work with the senator’s office to try to get a response to say where is that allocation, how was it distributed and what methodology of announcement and access to that money was given. As a coalition we have to hold leadership accountable.”
Sotelo as well as the other MCCADV members agreed that the city’s housing authority could greatly help those facing a violent situation by placing them at the top of the list.
“How do you move a family of five? Three kids in school, and they had a hard enough time making that call to say, ‘I’m being beat up, my husband is abusing me, my children are terrified, this man is threatening to kill me.’ And all we can offer is we’ll send you to Del Rio for 120 days or Carrizo Springs for 30 days,” said Sotelo. “Even 30 days to move, get your children out of school, work on a restraining order, then we’re going to send you back, and then what? The only way that women are going to be able to live a more independent life is through skills building, through continued support, and through having their own household and being able to support themselves. If we don’t have a shelter, at least we can be hopeful that we can remove that family and give them alternative living space in Eagle Pass, but that’s going to take policy change.”
With help from the Eagle Pass Housing Authority, not only survivors, but the community will see great improvements, just like in Del Rio where Housing Authority Director Cynthia De Luna will be presented with an award for her efforts in keeping domestic violence survivors from returning back to dangerous situations, he said.
“98 percent of women that have have come to our shelter have not returned to an abusive home, have their own house, have their own jobs, some of them chose to divorce their companion. We do not engage in that kind of counseling that’s a personal choice, but they’re not in abusive situations so we have many children that are not living in this environment of family violence,” said Sotelo. “Without her help we wouldn’t have this success.”
Residents of Kinney County and Uvalde are currently supporting the Val Verde Shelter because it is supporting the residents in that area, said Sotelo.
“Maverick County might say, ‘We don’t have to contribute.’ No you really don’t, that’s a question of conscience. We will continue to serve people from Eagle Pass whether they help us or not because we’re here to help the people, but I do pray that our leadership understands that that’s the population that they’re basically taking care of,” said Sotelo. “They can’t pass it on to law enforcement and say you guys take care of it. By the time law enforcement gets involved, it’s too late. We have to give the option to women to get out before it’s too late.”
He said it was taking so long to have the shelter built, that people are beginning to have their doubts about whether it will be built at all, including Paul Bailey, the man who Sotelo said allowed them to have their meetings at a church prior to MCCADV moving to their current meeting place at 2999 Lindburgh Circle.
“I don’t blame him. He’s been waiting for us for years to find some kind of funding,” said Sotelo. “We’ve had several deaths here, and the only way to protect our women and children from that kind of situation is to have a local shelter. Val Verde is building now an 8 bedroom shelter, this is being done by county funding. Uvalde is looking into giving land, already building their own shelter.”
Despite the current lack of a shelter, MCCAVD members said an easy, and free way to help prevent the continuation of family violence toward anyone, men included, is to stop treating it as the norm.
“The problem of normalizing family violence, is it becomes okay to do this because there’s certain things that a woman does that she ‘deserves it.’ It’s kind of like this craziness about ‘Well the woman was wearing a short skirt so she deserved to be raped.’ The community mind set must change,” said Sotelo. “Speak out against it. Any time someone says, ‘Se lo merecía,’ you say, ‘No, nadie se merece eso.’”